Freedom to Cheeto

Scene:  Interior, Living Room.  Modestly furnished and decorated
Time:  Friday, late afternoon

Jill, a slender young woman in her early-mid twenties, is sitting on the couch.  She is wearing sweatpants and an oversized t-shirt, watching tv.
Jackie, an athletic young woman in her early-mid twenties, enters.  She is dressed in fitness clothing that nicely shows off her body.

JACKIE:  (entering the living room)  Whatcha doing?
JILL:  Sitting on the couch, eating Cheetos.
JACKIE:  I just did two hours on the elliptical at the gym.  Now I'm gonna go and jump in the pool for a swim.
(Jill, still eating her Cheetos, looks at her)
JACKIE:  I'm feeling good!  Keeping it tight this summer!
JILL:  Good for you!  I'm still eating my Cheetos and sitting on the couch.
JACKIE:  Wait... How are you eating Cheetos and watching Biggest Loser?  Doesn't that make you feel bad about yourself?  Don't you feel guilty for eating crap while watching other people work out?
JILL:  Nope!  Only people I feel sorry for are those poor saps who wish they were eating Cheetos on the couch with me instead of working out like crazy people.  (Talking to the scene on the tv)  Yeah, fatty... You know you want my Cheetos!
JACKIE:  (shaking her head)  There is something seriously wrong with you.
JILL:  I think I'm perfectly normal and fabulous, and you are a judgey mc-judgerson!
JACKIE:  Come do some laps in the pool with me.
JILL:  No thanks.
JACKIE:  Why?
JILL:  Because you won't let me bring my Cheetos.
JACKIE:  You don't need the Cheetos!
JILL:  EVERYONE needs Cheetos!
JACKIE:  Don't you want to look good when you go to the beach.
JILL:  I do look good when I go to the beach.
JACKIE:  Yeah, but you could look better though...
JILL:  (Standing up, indignant)  Fact!  I look as good as you do in a bikini.  Fact!  Guys prefer a Cheetos loving fungirl over an exercise crazed, food fearing skinny chick.
JACKIE:  He we go...
JILL:  And Fact!  I could outlap you in the pool any day of the week!
JACKIE:  Good.  Come prove it then.
JILL:  Decline!
JACKIE:  Why?
JILL:  Because I'm not done eating my Cheetos.
JACKIE:  C'mon...
JILL:  Do we not live in a free world?
JACKIE:  (exasperated)  Oh brother....
JILL:  Do I not have the God given right to eat Cheetos, free of harassment and judgement?
JACKIE:  I don't think that's a God given right...
JILL:  Am I not an American, born free to wiggle my tasty orange fingers to whomever I want, whenever I want, however I want??
JACKIE:  (throws her hands up in the air)  I am done with you and this conversation.  I'm going to put my bathing suit on and jump in the pool
JILL:  (sitting back down)  Quitter.  I knew I could defeat you!
JACKIE: (walking away)  Whatever!  You didn't defeat me
JILL:    Yes I did!
JACKIE:  No you didn't!
JILL:  (sitting back down, eats another Cheeto)  Outwit.  Outlast.  Outplay.
JACKIE:    Whatever!
JILL:  (to herself more than anyone else)  Oooh... that was a good idea... maybe I'll watch Survivor next.  Yeah...  Jilly girl, you are one smart cookie.  Mmmm... cookies.  Yep.  I'm having cookies during Survivor too!